Staring Blankly

As much as I love to read, I have had trouble lately doing any actual reading. I’ve spent time searching for apartments and work, of course, but far more of it has been spent online doing… not much. Call it spinning your wheels, but I kept online in the idle hope that something would happen. I’ve put out several applications and have one major project that I hope takes off, and keep expecting something to pop up. Yep. Any second now. It’s a-coming… (drums fingers).

Ghah.

Eventually I push myself away from the table. Yet for some reason every time I pick up a book, I’ll read a chapter, put it back down, and go back online. Maybe the world changed in the last five minutes!

On days where I take a hike down to Starbucks I’ll bring my computer, my book, my writing pad, and my DS to play a crossword on. They have free internet access there. Guess what I spend most of my time doing?

A writer needs to read a lot and write a lot, and I don’t feel like I’m doing enough of either. I sit and wait and sit and wait, and then for a change of pace I wait and sit. I still do things online, still look for jobs and send out applications, but I feel like if I step away from the computer I’ll either miss something or am somehow not being diligent enough. As if part of me thinks reading and writing is the equivalent of slacking off.

Yeah, as opposed to staring the same things on the computer over and over which is soooooo productive.

To paraphrase The Doctor, “It’s a wibbly-wobbly brainy-wainy thing.”

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