Bike Theft Attempt

I make a point of letting my bikes look like crap.  The theory being that if it looks like crap nobody is going to want to steal it.  Well, some punk had very low standards today.  On the way home from work I stopped at a supermarket and parked my bike inside, something I do all the time since I don’t carry a lock with me, nor am I the only one to do so.

I get my groceries, pay, and notice out of the corner of my eye my bike magically elevating and sprinting out the store.  Didn’t even see the punk do it, just the bike magically moving as if on its own.

I ran out of the store, groceries in hand, just as the young hoodie tries peddling off.  He gets about a quarter block away before I catch up, grab him by the back of his hooded sweatshirt, yell “get off the bike you f*cker” and throw him off.  The punk had pretty good dexterity, because he didn’t fall off, he kept his footing, then… get this… has the balls to get all offensive around me.  Couldn’t make out a word he said, but his gesticulations and grunting were all “What right do YOU have to do that to ME, the guy who was just stealing your bike?”

I didn’t get involved beyond that, just made sure he didn’t have any buddies nearby ready to swarm, got on my bike and rode off.  I pretty much saw any other approach as no win.  What, I’m going to demand an apology?  Try and hold him for police?  Beat him up?  Yell at him? It’s all pointless.  Not to mention you pretty much expect a hoodie to have a knife these days, and even if I didn’t have only one free arm (the other holding groceries) I’m not about to get in a fight with an idiot.

What gets me is you could just tell from this guy’s face that he feels he’s the offended party, and if he recognized me some other time with his buddies I could be in trouble.  I just hope his adrenalin was pumping enough that he doesn’t actually remember what I look like.

Yeesh.  It’s a piece of crap bike, too.